Philips So Don't Care

I have this wonderful toothbrush. Philips Sonicare something or other. Anyway, having got the most out of the brush (you know, bristles at right angles), I decided to go out and get a replacement head. So, I go to the shop that sold me the device and cleverly thought if they sell the toothbrush, they must surely sell the replacement brush heads? Well yes and no as it turned out. Similarly like printers and replacement cartridges, the brush heads seemed just as expensive as the main unit. Nevertheless, I went ahead and bought 4 for the price of 3. Yes, £20 for a set of 4 plastic sticks isn't so painful when I know at some point in the past, suckers were only getting 3.

I get home and went to try it out. A bit like getting the most out of a shaving cartridge, you appreciate the quality of the new one as you need fewer square pieces of toilet paper. Having stuck the head on, I noticed a gap of about 5mm between the base of the head and the top of the unit. It also wasn't that stable. The last thing I needed was to appear on one of those TV programmes with a suspicious x-ray. I email Philips customer care about the problem and they ask for the model number of the toothbrush. I give it to them, but it occurred to me that Philips, in their ultimate wisdom to turn a profit, might have more than one model of these Sonicare thingies. Sure enough, the box says "standard", but in tiny characters gives the model number which was obviously different. Well, I wanted some freebies and waited for a reply from Mr Philips himself saying there'll be a lifetime's supply winging its way to me. I did eventually get a reply, but I guess it wasn't what I expected:

After reading your reply, I am able to confirm that this does not appear to be a fault with the toothbrush handle or the brush head.

When the brush head is connected to the handle there usually is a small gap between the two. I have the same model at home and it also has the same gap however there is no difference in performance.

Once again I do thank you for your patience in this matter and apologies again for any additiional inconvenience caused because of this.

Kind Regards

Adil
Philips Customer Care

By the time I got the reply, I had already sold off the remaining brush heads and got the right ones. I'm a little confused here though. By sheer coincidence, Adil had the same model at home. A little glimpse into the private life of a Customer Care representative one might say. All very well, but I wonder if he knows he's got the wrong brush heads!

Virgin at their jobs

Following on from our New York trip, I neglected to mention our experiences at the hands of Virgin Atlantic check-in desk. Drain has a fascinating, albeit irksome habit of being unpunctual to the point where if we were just a minute later, we'd never would have made it, whatever that may have been. This I'm guessing is how most women who are into their appearances behave. Nevertheless, this phenomenon of arriving in the nick of time doesn't go down well with check-in ladies. As we were invited to the naughty corner i.e. the queue for processing late comers, we waited patiently knowing we had at least been acknowledged and accepted. It was amusing as the surly check-in bitch got a power trip from turning away those who arrived after us. Probably lacked sex.

So, after waiting 10 minutes, it was our turn. Stuck the suitcase on the scales. The virgin Virgin said to us our case was over the limit. Apparently, there were BAA posters all around the airport telling us how a few grams would break the backs of their poor workers. We were very naughty children. As punishment, we had to open both our cases in front of the gawping rabble behind us and decide whether a pair of shoes is more dense than a stack of underwear. So having finally reduced the weight of both cases to the arbitrary limit, we started to get processed by her majesty.

This is a story I'm sure can be recounted by many travellers. However, the startling and not so common thing to happen was a sudden change of attitude by the minimum wage check-in woman. "Sorry to keep you waiting Sir", "Won't be much longer Sir", "Three bags full Sir". Neither of us had said anything to warrant a response which was now on par with actually wanting repeat business from their customers. Then I realised something. We were going economy class to New York, but snob class on the way back. Yes, training had kicked in as soon as she had seen the return leg cabin. So the training manual must say "Treat turd class passengers as contemptible scum, but kiss the arse of those going aristocratic class". Interesting business model. Perhaps she knew what she was doing and just reflected on the different cabins we were travelling on.